Ashness

Dear my Ashness

You never wore a watch because you didn’t want time to control you but time still enslaved you,ashness! You never found the time to live , you only survived every moment of your life. Your older self says because you are always rushing to somewhere or doing an assignment just an hour before its due.First year at Rhodes not only brings along with it “pre-drinks”, “crackling”, “random hook-ups” and “worst hangovers” but also “assignments” “pressure to get into JOURN2”,”referencing” and “drama rehearsals”. Looks like you realized the latter a bit too late! How could you not have struck the right balance,ashness? A kilometre away, some less fortunate matric student must be working day and night to get to where you are. And you just exploited this opportunity and lost your intellectuality down the “crackling” drain. Forgot the promise to make mommy and papa proud already? You are not the you your older self knew. You are not happy and you don’t realize that. The simple down-to-earth girl who used to sit with her mommy,watch “soapies” and gossip about the characters in the soapies has now turned into one of the characters in the soapie herself– fake and ugly.And is just as gossiped about. Was it the “cane-train” special at the union every Wednesday or the “10 rand draught” at the rat every Tuesday ,that led to your radical transformation? Maybe it was neither,maybe you were in love with the idea of letting go in first year and maybe in the process of letting go,you let go a bit too much.So Ashness, STOP! Stop chasing life, live it. By making the best of your potential, you can control time again.You can be happy again.

You know u love me and I love you
xoxox