If the curiously-named azab'sh was out for a plethora of mark-boosting commentary when she banged out her bigoted and semi-literate drivel on the corrupting influence of homosexuality, she could hardly have asked for a better outcome. All over the Rhodes-based blogosphere, students straight and queer are airing their umbrage. "What exactly are you talking about here?" squeals one. "Sexuality is a personal choice; it is part of who you are." "[H]ow in God's name," bellows another, "have you made it to university? Did you bribe your way through primary and high school? I think that my 7 year old cousin could have written this piece better than you did."
For myself, I have succeeded in keeping the indignation down to a stubbed toe, a broken window, several sleepless nights and a subtle musing on azab'sh's post-post silence: "I have naught to add to all this [an opinion, obviously, that I have since revised] other than my keen amusement at the reticence of the OP, who has had almost a week now to defend her bigotry. An apology, one feels, would suffice, but this silence betokens cowardice of the most pathetic strain."
All of which is something of a pity, really, when you consider how modestly the post begins. Never before, in fact, has the pre-storm calm been so cozening. "I really admire the University," she writes, "that [sic] it is encouraging students to be proud of their sexual status, whether they are gays or lesbians."
But almost immediately we are slaked with this artful buttering, her true colours are illumined and shown to be quite at odds with it. One is left to conclude at best that azab'sh is erratic and forgetful, at worst that she is a deceitful little turd. Glancing over at the contradiction again, I know where my money lies: "The old [gay] students have corrupted a lot of first years, who came here straight but because lesbianism and being gay is a fashion at Rhodes they have lost their values. [...] This lesbianism thing affects other people who have nothing to do with it because they start asking out innocent people, innocent people become victims of gay people and lesbians."
Seldom does writing of such derisory quality speak so eloquently for both itself and its author. "azab'sh" is plainly a zealot and a homophobe, and as such has no place at this university. Whatever reaction comes her way next (be it confined to more angry input on her blog or, as I believe condign, a rustication to sensitivity training), it is wholly merited. The fellowship that we once enjoyed has evaporated as quickly as her reputation.
Bashing bigotry
A Response To Homosexuality at Rhodes
What exactly are you talking about here? Sexuality is a personal choice; it is part of who you are. It is not something that can change just because it is "fashionable" to be Gay, Lesbian or Bisexual. When you make a statement like this: "lesbianism and being gay is a fashion at Rhodes" you are insulting those people who are Lesbian and Gay. These people go through incredible difficulties in their home, work and public environment because of who they are. They feel safe to come "out" at Rhodes because this campus provides a safe and understanding environment. A society like OutRhodes aims to make lesbian, gay, bisexuals and transgendered (LGBT) people on campus feel like they can be themselves. The society exists to stop people ostracising LGBT’s and not to ostracise straight people. I can’t possibly see how straight people can feel ostracised when we live in a hetero-normative society.
Comment on the "Risky Business" cartoon
Discombobulated about the question of whether comments on other bloggers' cartoons belong on their blogs or those of the commentators, I have decided to go for both and hope that one holds the kitty. My verbose and disingenuous praise reads thus:
"At last a cartoon worthy of the designation, an example that serves not to profane the work of such deities as Zapiro and Dr Jack. I am particularly enamoured of the application of a dominant colour scheme to each of your strip-blocks and the general quality of your camera work. The dialogue captures splendidly the rustic flavour of the Western burr, while the outfitting and scenery reflect the no-doubt considerable effort that you have put into the entire project. Self-deprecating without being farcical and risqué without being vulgar, it makes for a most enjoyable read. I do wish, however, that you would not insist on straining my already-myopic eyes to such unreasonable lengths: picking up the bubbles' content and often even the action itself is a task nigh on impossible. Is there not some way to enlarge the thing?"
For said cartoon and other falderal, visit Risky Business now.
Testily,
Cock
The Vicious life cycle of a Rhodent
The Vicious life cycle of a rhodent
If you have been under the pressure of being “mashed” by so many assignments during the week and have resorted to excessive alcohol ,to get away from that pressure, during the weekends, then you are the typical “rhodent” living the typical “viscous life cycle”. Being a typical rhodent myself,I know the feeling after a week of excessive workload and partying. It feels as if a truck ran over me paralysing every muscle in my body.
The root cause for the “wild party animal” tag that only the Rhodes University first year students have especially the B.A students, is not because of the alcohol but due to the excessive work that the Humanities department here burdens students with compared to other universities . When I interviewed a first year Bachelor of Arts student, Bhavesh Ram, from the University of Witwatersrand regarding the workload for B.A students in their university, I found out that they don’t have compulsory tutorials and they only have one or two assignments a term. That work leads to excessive drinking and which in turn causes many students to let go of their moral values and end up doing something they will be ashamed of the next morning.
My journalism lecturer Sim Kyazze knows that the Humanities department has a bad reputation for the workload but he thinks it’s important for everyone to know that it’s not like that. According to him,it’s the students complain because they just don’t want to work. In my opinion, that’s not true because what lecturers don’t see the stressful students working in the Jac labs till 4 am in the morning working on a linguistic assignment just after they have finished writing a profile comment for journalism and still have to study for a sociology test that counts 25% of their year mark.
At the end of five days of innumerable assignments and compulsory tutorial workpoints, I would also say what Ryan Haynes, first year B.A student said in his facebook status, “Fuck work, I am getting drunk tonight…”.
On a Friday, students are seen walking up the Prince Alfred street with bottles of vodka for a “massive” night. Among those students, there are first years like Kelly Styane who don’t enjoy drinking but end up getting drunk on the weekends since there is no other form of entertainment in Grahamstown. But as Roxanne says “Binge-drinking is an activity many first years engage in but not many acknowledge the vicious consequences that it induces”. While many end up in a stranger’s bed the morning after a “massive” night, many end up injuring themselves. So is it not true that the workload is lowering the moral standards of the first years at Rhodes University?
Like a merry-go-round ,this vicious cycle of work to alcohol to “walk of shame” or bumpy forehead continues week after week.The only thing that can disturb this cycle is the realization by the Humanities department that students really need a “BREAK” .we can only learn from our mistakes and grow as better human beings if we have the time to think about what we have done in the past nine months.
By-Ayushi ChhabraAshness
Comment on a photo comic
“Love and Crime” http://www.pointingpurple.blogspot.com/
I really enjoyed your comic guys! It was great how you used an audience from another production as your audience. But are you sure you won’t cause yet more drama – excuse the pun – over the incident that happened in the drama department? I’m surprised none of the drama teachers or students haven’t made any comments yet! I mean it’s almost like you’re mocking the whole thing in a way. Should I now be scared of the theatre?
I think it was a good idea however, for you guys to show that CPU caught the baddies but did they really in the original incident? Don’t get me wrong, CPU is an awesome campus protection but I think you’re giving them credit for something they didn’t initially do. But I see why you did it in your comic, so as to not portray CPU as being totally unreliable which is good because they aren’t! Very cool comic – I can see you guys put a lot of effort into it. Nice!
Jess http://www.fourhensandacock.blogspot.com/
Comment on a Profile story
“Letter To My Younger Self” http://www.etto-pressurepoints.blogspot.com/
Ettione, I agree with your letter completely. I also find that in order to survive first year at Rhodes University , one needs to find a balance between work and play; a balance between social and academic life. I think that drinking forms a major component in making friends. My ‘letter to the younger self’ focused on making friends and the challenges thereof. I think drinking, for some, honestly leads them to believe that they will ‘fit in’ and ultimately make friends. Binge drinking with people to make ‘friends’, for example.
Alcohol and the abuse thereof is a big issue for many first year students on all campuses. I believe that in order to survive first year one needs to be “greater than that” and have the “self-control to say no”. A “balance between social and academic life” needs to be built. Only then can one make true friends.
Jess http://fourhensandacock.blogspot.com/
Comment on "That Girl" by Strawberries
“That Girl”
By strawberries http://www.themanbarbie.blogspot.com
Strawberries, I thoroughly enjoyed your profile piece. I found it quite quirky and humorous. It is clear that the hero in your piece is someone who has managed to fit in well at Rhodes - despite her ‘non-girly’ drinking habits. It is evident that the hero has overcome adjusting to Rhodes and having people adjust to her being not the ‘normal’ stereotypical girl who drinks a little and doesn’t smoke at all. It is also clear that your politics allow you to view a person who tends to visit the library often as a “library nerd”. You do not however seem hostile to any old Rhodes traditions. A very good profile - I most enjoyed it!
Jess http://www.fourhensandacock.blogspot.com/
"I survived depression in my First Year of university!"
She walks with caution. Each step sends a glimpse over her shoulder. Dressed in dark denim jeans and a long-sleeved black top with a hint of white, she has changed a great deal from her earlier months of wearing just wearing black clothing. Ettioné is in first year at Rhodes University and she is a survivor of depression!
My best friend greets me with a soft shy smile that is almost hidden behind her small translucent eyes that tell a story of her past. We casually chat about first year and the adaptions we’ve had to make, over a cup of coffee at the Kaif. “The adjustment to first year in the beginning of the year was quite easy,” she says, twirling the spoon in her coffee with her slender fingers – their nails coated in black nail polish. “I adjusted well, especially in the first week”.
She goes into detail as she explains how things got tough; the pressure of work being the first to engulf her. “I started stressing about the work load so I went out and partied and drank a lot. So much so that I eventually couldn’t even go out anymore!” Her expression changes from one of concernment to sadness. “I started distancing myself from my friends. I became very quiet and alone.”
As I asked how she managed to cope, she tightened her grip around the sleeve of her arm. “I found a way to make myself feel better. That’s when I started cutting my arms. I told no one.” I felt a slight bit of awkwardness in the air around us. She went on to tell me how she tried to hide her cuts. “I always wore long-sleeved tops.” She would wash out her bloody pyjama’s every morning.
Etto, as she is commonly known, told me of how everything started going wrong. “Life fell out of place for me. I often got crap marks for journ and I constantly worried about not making it into second year.” She is studying towards a BJourn (Bachelor of Journalism) degree so the pressure is always on to be a top achiever. “Alcohol couldn’t numb the pain I felt anymore, it made me sick to my stomach when I thought of what a failure I had become. So I started eating a helluva lot!” She ate sweets, chocolates, cakes, pasteries – whatever she could get her hands on she would consume. “The sight I saw in the mirror was a fat me and it made me even more self-conscious and depressed. My self-esteem was gone.”
Etto is a local, having lived in Grahamstown for just over ten years she is now still living at home with her parents. “It’s not easy living at home,” she says. “My parents are always on my case! Irritating me with their rules and restrictions.” Her cutting continued to worsen. Her mom nearly having a stroke, her irritating favoured elder sister and her smokaholic father seemed to make matters worse, in her eyes. “I would always wear black clothes. They ‘hid’ me from the world.”
Luckily the road to recovery came sooner than expected for Etto. “The day that you noticed the cuts on my arms was the day I started tying again. I opened up to you, got lots of things off my chest and realized that there was hope for me!” A week or so later after I had spoken to her about her arms, Etto met an “awesome guy” – Lance, who is now her boyfriend. “He saw my sadness and he helped and comforted me a lot!”
Etto is now on the road to recovery. She attempts to get along with her sister. She no longer binge eats or drinks but instead spends her time with her boyfriend and close friends. Her black sleeve dappled with white patches wipes a tear from her cheek where a tiny smile starts to appear. Etto is my best friend and she has survived depression in her first year. She is a remarkably strong person and is testament to the power of hope and believing in a person’s life.
First Year is all about being in res - not living at home with your parents!
It’s your first year at University – your first year out of school. New friends, new subjects, new surroundings but most importantly…res! The only way to experience all the fun and drama of first year is by being in res. A tiny room, yuck res food, cold showers and an active social life – perfect! Or is it? I strongly believe that first year can be experienced and enjoyed in exactly the same way if one lives at home…with their parents.
As the old saying goes: “there is nothing better than a home-cooked meal”, and I fully agree. Be it from mom or dad, a good plate of food always goes down well, very well. Lucky for me I am blessed with this privilege everyday. Do I ever get tired of it? Not a chance!
Res life. With all its perks and wonders, really isn’t that great. Sure, friendships and bonds are made, fun is had, rules are broken and money is spent. A whole new ‘family’, a new ‘home away from home’ is formed. Yet students who live at home with their parents share in on the exact same things. Students at home have just as much fun, can make just as many friends and still get to enjoy coming home to a real family every evening (or morning).
What are the pros of living at home with the parentals? The list is endless. Mom (or dad’s) made-with-tender-loving-care roast on Sunday with veggies, full remote control access and power whenever desired (no bookings needed), piping hot baths or showers and a HUGE warm bed to snuggle in every night. Just to mention a few…
And the cons? Home isn’t always paradise as I’m sure you would’ve noticed in your 18 years of living at home. Sibling rivalry appears to be on the increase as stated by Ettioné Ferreira. (http://www.etto-pressurepoints.blogspot.com). “My sister and I fight a lot!” she says. Then there’s the awful sound of the kitchen sink filling up with bubbly water and the innocent, yet daunting, plea: “please come help dry up a few dishes pumpkin”. What a lie! There’s never only a “few” dishes.
Meagan Claasen, on whether staying at home is better than res, definitely enjoys the comfort and support of her family. “I can do whatever I want” she says with a naughty smirk. She also believes that she can get more work done at home and that she has “way more freedom”. (g08c2330@campus.ru.ac.za). Ettioné Ferreira, although experiencing some sibling difficulties, also prefers home life to res life. “I get to watch television all day long! And I get to decide what I want to eat, whenever I want it” she says. Yet a few more reasons as to why home-life is better than res-life. I can definitely vouch for couch potatoe!
There are always two sides to every story so I have also got comments from students living in res. Jethro Le Roux of De Beers House thoroughly enjoys living in residence. He prefers it to home because one can experience a sense of ‘spirit’. He does however, not like the res rules at all; “they tend to oppress one”. (g08l0874@campus.ru.ac.za). Isabel Collett also loves res, perhaps because she has been in hostel for five years of her school career. She says that she’d have to do “stupid chores” if she lived at home during her first year and that would simply be “the pits!” (g08c2341@campus.ru.ac).
It is clear to me that students living at home in their first year tend to enjoy all the fun and drama just as much as res students do, if not more! Students at home love living at home. Students living in res love res and thoroughly enjoy their first year experience too – perhaps also due to being in such close proximity to everything on campus.
Despite many gloats of the “Ha! You live at home with your parents, shame!” phrase, I still prefer home life to res life. Just as much fun is had in an already familiar environment with the most amazing support system (and food!) in the world. Oppi’s (non-res students) living at home with their families are not deprived or disadvantaged in any way by living off campus. The exact same facilities are available. My name is Jess, I’m in first year and I’m proud to say I live at home with my parents and I love it!
Comment on stawberries profile
While scrolling through the list of blogs, my eye caught the attention of a blog , http://www.themanbarbie.blogspot.com/, with a distinguished yet interesting name, The Man Barbie. On opening that blog, I found a post, “That girl” made by “strawberries” which is not only intriguing but also very relevant to the life of the students on campus.It is about a first year,Rachel who, as the Russian folklorist Propp describes, is a “hero” for fighting the villainous stereotypes that people attach to one another. With the help of impressive descriptions of her appearances and sensible use of quotes, the writer has been successful in bringing out her strong personality which helped her overcome, what Tzvetan Todorov calls “disruption”, in her first year life. The disruption was caused due to the judgements passed by other students on the basis of her choice of friends or her unusual behaviour. However,by being true to herself,she reinstated “equilibrium” in her life and is happy with the choice of her university.
Ashness
www.fourhensandacock.blogpot.com
Profile
There’s a knock at my door and before I even have the chance to open my mouth, the door flies open and my room is filled with an excited cry of “Neighbour!” and a cacophony of sound from the many bracelets adorning the arms of my visitor. Meet Courtenay-Jade Gillespie, a.k.a. ‘Neighbs’. Courtenay as can be deducted is my neighbour – well, technically we live opposite one another, but she’s never been one for technicalities. This is the girl who always has a smile on her face, she dresses how she wants to dress and she exudes confidence, but behind everything you can see, is someone who has dealt with many trials over the past six months and has bounced back. “You know, I worked my ass off to get here” she says as she brushes her short blonde hair from her face “but it wasn’t what I expected at all.” In fact, she (like many other first years) expected Rhodes University and Grahamstown itself to retain the National Arts Festival vibe. Being a self-proclaimed Peace Child, my neighbour thought the student life here would be very different from that of students in Johannesburg and Cape Town “I don’t drink too much, I don’t do drugs and I thought everyone else here would be the same... But they’re not”. Rhodes students binge drinking is one of the main problems that pushed her to her decision to leave Rhodes. One of the others being that, like many other first years, Courtenay found living away from home extremely difficult. She had never been away from home for longer than two weeks. One of the issues some students deal with while being here is the loss of a strong family base and Courtenay was one of many who found it incredibly hard to be away from her family “I didn’t have that support base any more, I didn’t know who to talk to, where to go, I just knew that I wanted to leave”.
Finding out her dad had cancer was all she needed to make her want to leave Rhodes even more than before “I thought the fastest way to get out of here was to fail first semester exams”. After not studying for an exam and failing on purpose, she was fully prepared to handle the consequences but all that preparation would prove unnecessary. She shakes her head and laughs at the irony of her next statement “ I wanted to leave to be with my dad, but he was what made me stay”. For the first time since I’ve known her, her voice drops to almost a whisper “when the floor beneath you crumbles, you realise life is fragile”. For my neighbour, the floor fell in the minute she heard the words “I have six months” come out of her father’s mouth. It was these words that made her realise what she was throwing away by leaving “I was taking the easy way out, all he wanted from me was to be successful and I realised that failing won’t get me anywhere and he would just be disappointed”.
Courtenay flashes me one of her bright smiles “So here I am, working my ass off again”. She came back after the long July vac ready to fix the mistakes she made back in first semester and with a whole new approach to life. “The way I see it, you can either stand above life, or you can get swallowed by it. I choose to stand.”
Garth Elzerman: A Profile in Verse
Garth Elzerman is an atavist
Of a quaint and glorious strain.
His comportment always is solid,
His speech ever smooth and urbane.
Yet what makes him the hero of this rhyme
Is neither mien nor chatty panache.
Nay, what makes him so very unique is
His svelte and dishy moustache.
Not a walrus like that borne by Nietzsche,
Nor Hitler's profound little square;
Not even as slender as Dalí's,
Is Garth's lip-bound facial hair.
Yet it is by no means bien pensant,
Not bound by scruples and qualms.
Although it ain't vulgar and showy,
It nonetheless tickles the palms.
"I am a barefaced eccentric;
"I make no apologies for that.
"My moustache is a manifestation,"
Claims Garth in a coffee-room chat.
Even though he has suffered the catcalls
Of fools yoked by modern-day more,
He stays well away from his razor
And so retains a vestige of yore.
"It effuses sophistication;
"It makes me look smart and demure;
"And, to all potential lovers,
"It carries a certain allure."
The voters, too, it attracted
When Garth ran for the SRC,
And, despite all his quirks and his foibles,
He won there a great victory.
That such a singular fellow,
So unusual and quirky a chap,
Could overcome all to be elected
Is worthy of more than a clap.
"To every moustache-owner out there,"
Says Garth with his face all aglow,
"I say, 'You can manage it, too!'"
My, what a model hero.
Living the Jan Smuts life
“ Fuck” Fuck” Fuck”, “this place is a fucking shit hole,I just wanna go home” she said as she was walking up and down the Jan smuts dining hall looking for “chutney” and a fork .Fumingly flushed with disgust of looking at the bottom of the salad plate covered with mayonnaise and the only “chutney” she could find, she gave up and sat next to me.
Her disappointment at the dining hall was evident from her eyes that could pour out her suppressed tears of homesickness and irritation, any moment. That made me introduce myself to her and offer her some of my “chutney”. This is how I met my best friend and a true survivor of the legendary food of the Jan Smuts dining hall,Amy Esterhuizen, http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=665831362&ref=ts .
Today,as we talk about the dining hall in her room ,Amy enthusiastically sits up and excitedly tells me about all her,as she calls it, “traumatic experiences” in the dining hall. She starts with the time in Orientation Week when she found her finger nail in her juice and a bug in her salad. “ I felt all the digestive juices revolting and pushing against the walls of my stomach and thrusting upwards towards my mouth” said Amy as she was describing this experience to me.
Without any pause, she went on to speak about the time when she walked into the kitchen of the dining hall to get a tray and it smelt like “a dead rat” or “a rotten banana”. Her vibrancy at the mention of the dining hall topic showed her willingness to talk about her experiences in the dining hall.
Adapting oneself to the unfriendly food servers ,the sticky tables and the “monkey’s brain” like meat was really hard for Amy considering the high quality food that she has in the luxury of her home by her chef mother.No matter how hard it was, Amy managed to pull through eight months of eating in the same dining hall.
On being asked how she managed to pull through,she looked up at the sealing ,sighed and then looked into my eyes and said “This is university,not home .. You get over it”. After making this bold mature statement,she randomly has a sarcastic laugh and says “I have to eat because I have to survive”. That’s when I knew that from the day I saw Amy till today, she has come a long way. Nowadays , neither do the oily chips nor does the fattening food bother her because Amy has changed her way of thinking. She thinks that “if something is not the way you like it,don’t complain rather make it the way you like it”.Infact the same girl who threw a tantrum for not finding “chutney”, taught me how to make a delicious meal out of the meal we get at our dining hall.
Ashness
www.fourhensandacock.blogspot.com
comment on Nonlie's letter
Nonlie’s letter to her younger self on http://www.firstyearblood.blogspot.com/ reminded me of my letter to my younger self ,Ashness on http://fourhensandacock.blogspot.com/ in many ways. Like me, Nonlie also talks to her younger self about how her mind deviated from her purpose to be here because of the influence of alcohol and partying. While I give an example of “cane train” special at the union and Nonlie spoke about “southern comfort and lime at olde 65, both of us stressed on the same point of facing drastic consequences of having a,like Nonlie puts it,” hectic social life”. The drastic consequences that were faced by me , as I mentioned in my letter, are mostly the same as Nonlie such as working on assignments at the last moment and failing most of them, almost passing June exams but most importantly, not living up to our families’ expectations. In our letters, we question our younger selves to wake them up from their deep sleep and welcome to,as Nonlie says “reality”.
Much love sister
Ashness
http://fourhensandacock.blogspot.com/
Letter to my younger first year self
Dear Free Spirit
New beginnings come with new challenges and this year will be no different. Rather you will be faced with greater challenges that you are ready to face if you put your mind to it. One such great challenge is not as intimidating as you view it to be in your mind. You have always known that you are some what of an acquired taste to have as a friend and this is what makes you uniquely Angelina. It should never have been a topic for discussion in therapy making friends can be an intimidating task. Making friends, inner peace with your self , genuine happiness and that thirst for adventure are the characteristics that you have always possessed and need not lose at this new stage in your life.
Your fear of not fitting-in and being isolated to only your thoughts as company does not have to be a constant reality. Discovering new people does not mean forgetting who you are. It is difficult for you to trust people but fear only holds you back from some of the best relationships you will nature during the cause of this year. When doubt leaps over your thoughts about the pleasure that you are to others remember always the friends in your heart , people who make a pleasant difference during this journey called life. Once you have distinguished the people that love and genuinely care for you, your first year becomes more exciting and memories that you will cherish for years to come will be created. I still cringe at the sexual freedom exhibited by some of the students at the OutRhodes parties , our own then SRC president parading half naked at the Old Goal this was his alter ego which was the theme of that particular party. You will soon learn to enjoy and never miss any such parties in the future.
Expand your horizons and try new things go to places and events you usually would not , engage in broader conversations even with strangers and develop a relationship with your course work. All these will provide you with a better sense of belonging and enjoying the time you will be spending here at University.
Love always
Angelina Ballerina
Jessy
My Dearest Jessy
How have you been keeping? Still as stubborn as ever? I hope things are well. I just thought I would write you on my experience of First Year at Rhodes as I know you will be in my same situation next year. I really hope you will take my advice into consideration.
Do you remember how we used to be the popular best friends at school? We had all the friends in the world! We were invited to all the ‘cool’ parties, always had the hottest boyfriends and were always with the latest trends. Rhodes is very different from school. There aren’t many rules, no one tells you what to do and there are THOUSANDS of other students. You must not think for these reasons it’s easy to make friends - it’s not! Especially when you live at home with your parents like me, and like you will too next year.
By living at home you are very restricted with curfews, chores and all the hassle and noise of a family that irritates you very quickly seeing as you’ve already lived with them for 18 years of your life! You need to remember that in order to make friends you need to be a friend first, and friends are an essential at university. Your parents will have taught you how to grow up but it is your friends who mould you, who teach you about love and life and whom you can share absolutely anything with.
You need to remember that life isn’t easy. You no longer get ‘spoon-fed’ at university. When times get tough you have to push through with your head held high. Be as outgoing and spontaneous as you already are. Talk to people. Laugh about things with people. Find a balance between work and play. You should make friends quickly but just in case you don’t make any concrete ones, don’t stop trying. Be yourself, enjoy life and make the most of your opportunities. I hope you take my advice to heart. See you next year!
Forever friends
Jess
xx
Ashness
Dear my Ashness
You never wore a watch because you didn’t want time to control you but time still enslaved you,ashness! You never found the time to live , you only survived every moment of your life. Your older self says because you are always rushing to somewhere or doing an assignment just an hour before its due.First year at Rhodes not only brings along with it “pre-drinks”, “crackling”, “random hook-ups” and “worst hangovers” but also “assignments” “pressure to get into JOURN2”,”referencing” and “drama rehearsals”. Looks like you realized the latter a bit too late! How could you not have struck the right balance,ashness? A kilometre away, some less fortunate matric student must be working day and night to get to where you are. And you just exploited this opportunity and lost your intellectuality down the “crackling” drain. Forgot the promise to make mommy and papa proud already? You are not the you your older self knew. You are not happy and you don’t realize that. The simple down-to-earth girl who used to sit with her mommy,watch “soapies” and gossip about the characters in the soapies has now turned into one of the characters in the soapie herself– fake and ugly.And is just as gossiped about. Was it the “cane-train” special at the union every Wednesday or the “10 rand draught” at the rat every Tuesday ,that led to your radical transformation? Maybe it was neither,maybe you were in love with the idea of letting go in first year and maybe in the process of letting go,you let go a bit too much.So Ashness, STOP! Stop chasing life, live it. By making the best of your potential, you can control time again.You can be happy again.
You know u love me and I love you
xoxox
Letter...
Dear young one,
A great journey lies ahead of you. It will not be easy, but the path to university will be filled with challenges and experiences that will allow you to grow and become strong. Do not fear leaving home, Rhodes will be everything you want it to be – more, if you let it. This university is a remarkable place, soon after arriving; you will feel more at home than you have ever felt before. It may not be easy in the beginning, but Rhodes and the town it belongs to will soon become as much a part of you as you will of it. This next bit is going to sound quite old and tired, but bear with me – I promise it will be worth it. Always remember that you should never change who you to impress others. You will find that you will make the most amazing set of friends just by being who you are. Your first year at Rhodes will be the best year of your life, you will discover things about yourself that you never thought existed, you will grow and change and realise that you are so much stronger and interesting than you ever thought you were. Mostly, you will learn and you will add incredible experiences to your memories. Remember that happiness is key, do the things that will make you happy – well, to a degree, going to lectures is strongly advised – if you do this then you will take the best memories away with you.
I wish you luck and strength for the things that will soon come,
Love your older counterpart